I m in the other situation, local male in Beijing, in my late twenties, decent job in the government, easygoing and interesting, western hearted, dumped by Chinese girlfriends twice for their selfish and arrogant cases. I am really sad about the girls here all love expats. want to know me more? stiw@yahoo.cn is my email. We could be friends if you like.

It's probably really easy for western women to find guys to date in Beijing. Find a single guy in a bar and talk to him. Many of us don't date Chinese girls.

The main problem that my friends talk about a lot, is that expats are always leaving. I was based in Shanghai for the last 18 months and you kinda go through cycles of friends, not many people I knew stayed longer than 6 months. I guess it gears you towards not seeking a relationship with an expat because there's no point.

These expats (your potential dates) are also probably leaving, so it's easier to just aim for Chinese birds rather than work towards a relationship with an expat. You're going to leave in a few months anyway so what's the point?

Personally, I think you should look for expats who have just had a Chinese girlfriend. I, for example, need time off from a Chinese other half... so when I finally arrive in Beijing I suppose I'll be looking to date expats for a change.

I *might* still be willing to date a white woman.

Cuz I've forgotten what they taste like.

What is it, like sweaty cottage cheese?

(And I'm sorry but the stubbly leg shaving is ewwwww.... I mean what are you, some subspecies, like an Wookie?)

Nonetheless, the natural speaking of the English would be a big plus.

Since the retard talk does kinda wear thin after a while.

> I *might* still be willing to date a white woman.

Hey Sciency, why don't you write a list of the top five things a beggar is not able to do.

Was "choosing" somewhere near the top? Congratulations, you are an iota nearer to self awareness.

heeheehee! =D>

What's with all the tee-heeing, are you his girlfriend?

well, there's also the issue of guys who advertise themselves as this one week:

and this the next week

posted by the originator of this thread, no less
http://www.thebeijinger.com/forum/2011/04/05/All-White-Women

Watch out, ladies!

You're not going to warn her about the "Sex and the City" stereotype and how that leads to inappropriate groping from the locals on dates? This inaccurate stereotype makes them believe we're like prostitutes they don't have to pay. They're usually so handsy that they could have been sued for sexual harassment/assault in the West. It makes me and my friends so uncomfortable that we usually don't date Chinese men at all.

As far as I can tell, I'm not the only one: http://garusso.blogspot.com/2009/08/peter-hessler-and-laowai-nuzi.html

http://www.speakingofchina.com/ask-the-yangxifu/western-women-not-sluts/ (She did marry a Chinese man -- the one who actually didn't do this.)

This stereotype can even make dating downright dangerous. I had one guy take his pants off in a KTV bar on a first date because "it's time for sex now." I was fine because I served in the IDF and know Krav Maga; my friend was not. You guys may think it's funny, but for women, it's a really bad safety issue.

Moreover, because China places a premium on everyone appearing happy all the time, no one says anything -- particularly not to their male friends. What's worse is that those friends aren't observant enough to figure out what's really going on beneath the surface.

The biggest mistake I made was listening to men about women's experiences before coming to China. As a rule of thumb, they're not as observant as women when it comes to social dynamics, especially when it comes to life is like for women. Moreover, I think it's better to lose hope and focus on more meaningful things than to bang your head against the wall and be frustrated all the time.

I have to admit I don't know much about the dating scene first hand, but I have had friends with varying degrees of success.

I think age is one big factor. I was kind of shocked to read Jordan's experiences with local guys. Were these guys under or over 30?

Anyway, Bron, your posts show that you are normal and have realistic expectations. I think you will be fine.

I find that most expat women today like to have a whinge about their dating prospects all the while ignoring the basics that are applicable right around the world which are:

Men have now become socialized to think of the ideal woman as being pint sized and wafer thin.

Men respond more to visual stimulus and so looks will always be the most important thing.

With that in mind clearly when expat men arrive in China and are presented with a pool of women that tend to be small and slim and who view them as exotic and worldly to the point where dating for an expat man is nigh akin to shooting fish in a barrel then naturally they are not going to pay much attention to expat women.

^^ Excuse me if I don't immediately take your word for it on that one Mr Chinese people not speaking English properly is effing hilarious.