Breaking News! Old Order Mennonites Show Unusual Resistance to the Coronavirus.Breaking News! Covid Virus Found on Moon.Breaking News!!! Covid Found in Fish!!!
All fish are now required to wear a mask at all times, and maintain a 1.5 metre distance from every other fish. 大白 are vigilantly scouring the seas, and a complete disinfection of all oceans is expected soon.
Earth samples from the latest moon probe have found the Corona Virus on the moon!! All travel to and from the moon has been halted, unless you have a green code. As Dr. Fauci says, ` look, we all know there are rocks on the moon. Rocks can be used to hit someone on the head. Therefore, in order to keep eveyone safe from possible moon rock assault you need 10 shots of the vaccine, wear three masks, and hide simpering in your nearest closet'.
`When queried about their unusual hardihood, 97 year old Mennonite Elder Lemuel Schlikenberger shrugged noncholantly and stooped down to pick tomato worms off his tomato plants. Finally, when pressed for a response, he said, quote ` Look, we don't have T.V., we don't have the internet, this ....whatever ya call it, ... 'Coronka virus' stuff don't much matter here, we jus work every day at hard physical labour, grow our own food and don't pay much never mind to what the fools around us are yammering on about'
So saying he sqaushed a big fat tomato worm under his foot and carried on.