British Expat Details Dating Doldrums in Daily Mail Article

Ladies, if you're looking to date in Beijing, localize your operations – at least according to the advice of one British expatriate, published Sunday on The Daily Mail's website.

"In Beijing, even the most average Western men are able to attract pretty Chinese girls, who seem to be under the impression that they have all the style and sophistication of Daniel Craig. As a result, the streets of the city are filled with smug-looking Western guys holding hands with their pint-sized Chinese princesses," she wrote.

The 30-year-old Aaron found an alternative to said "smug-looking Western guys": "Unlike the majority of Western women living in China, who watch bitterly as the egos of below-average men swell from the admiring looks of Chinese girls, I took an altogether different approach and chose to date Chinese men instead."

RELATED: Three Things to Know about Chinese-Foreigner Dating

The plan seems to have borne initial fruit for her. "Having a native boyfriend was like being given a key to China. I learned so much more about the country, its people and their values during the three years we were together. It was fascinating to be with someone from whom I learned something new every day. Thanks to that relationship, I can speak colloquial Mandarin (including the kind of swear words that one should never, ever use) and prepare traditional Chinese dumplings with the speed and skill of Ken Hom," said Nikki Aaron, whose LinkedIn profile lists her as a presenter on a Xinhua News Agency television show, and a former employee of City Weekend.

However, every rose has its thorn, and apparently, so does having a Chinese boyfriend. Aaron eventually parted ways with her Mandarin dumpling master. "It was an accumulation of things I found increasingly hard to ignore, such as his criticism of Western women (who he would condemn for being overweight, aggressive and too easy) and my deteriorating patience with his personal habits (the stomach-churning sound he made as he spat in the bathroom sink – a daily habit of most locals – or his insistence on wearing the same unwashed clothes for several days in a row)."

Aaron apparently has decided that she may never find love in Beijing. "I have now come to the conclusion that my romantic endeavours will always be severely tested while I remain in China," she wrote.

At least she learned one important lesson: "I also understand what really makes Chinese people tick."

Learn more about Aaron and her fondness of hygiene and table manners here.

How's the dating scene in Beijing? Tell us in the Comments section below, or discuss it in our Forum.

Email: stevenschwankert@thebeijinger.com
Twitter: @greatwriteshark
More stories by this author here.

Image: The Daily Mail

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Here's another take on the Foreign/Chinese dating scene:

Love Actually: Dating in Beijing
http://wanderonwards.com/2013/11/14/love-actually-dating-in-beijing/

 

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J.Smooth wrote:

I like this bog, but I'm not trying to date any of the local women, just looking for NSA fun. But, unfortunately, so many of them are so traditional, which makes it hard.

Makes it hard? And you DON'T LIKE that?

No wonder you're UN-fortunate.

Biggrin

Here's Beijing Cream's take on the same subject:

http://beijingcream.com/2013/12/blonde-ambition-how-xinhua-used-a-brit-to-sex-up-propaganda/#comments

They link to her -- gasp! -- own website, www.nikkiaaron.com. Oh, the violation of privacy! Aside from carrying photos of her, articles about her, samples of her work, and <clutching chest> her Twitter handle!

Nikki linked to our article above on her own website. So maybe you can give your high horses a breather now?

Hey, this post is setting some sort of modern-day TBJ record for comments on a blog post. Perhaps we need to get Nikki Aaron to start blogging for us ...

 

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Standards, I apologize for sharing my views. I honestly did not realize that it would give that impression. I guess my five years of constructive commenting have done me no good. (Though it's been a lot longer than five years--I just lost my login then and had to get a new one. I guess that sounds even worse; with MORE than five years of commenting, I should clearly know better than to say anything negative in the comments. Always ruffles feathers and doesn't really help anything.)

Thus ends my comments on the writing quality of TBJ.

Doubt wisely; in strange way / To stand inquiring right is not to stray; / To sleep, or run wrong, is. (Donne, Satire III)

"I've noticed a lot of newer writers, and I've also noticed that TBJ's articles have gotten increasingly sloppy over the past year or so, and well, kind of boring."

This seems to suggest you've noticed a pattern of substandard writing over an extended period of time. Not that you stumbled across it while making a regular visit and then realized at once that the quality of the writing had dropped.

You make a very spurious argument in suggesting I didn't have to read your comment. I enjoy reading the comments, and on occassion notice that some of them are idiotic. My comment was not intened to be either sharp or witty. I wouldn't dare to challenge a snarky commentor like yourself with over five years of constructive commenting in the bag.

But I maintain that if I was troubled enough by something to comment on how much it sucks, then I'd probably not bother reading it anymore, let alone comment on it. Obviously you enjoy it. And good luck to you. Your comments don't offend me in the slightest. I just thought it was a valid point to raise.

"Dis is China, you know? You don't like, you go home!"

Sorry my comment seemed idiotic to you, standards. You do realize that you didn't have to read my comment, right? You could have avoided reading it entirely and then you wouldn't have been assaulted by the idiocy of my idiotic comment.

Oh. Wait. But how then would you have even known that the comment was idiotic? How then could you have posted your sharp-though-not-so-witty comeback?

Ah, the circle of illogical idiocy. How can one know which articles to avoid reading when one hasn't read them to determine whether or not they're well-written? If only there could be some kind of color-coding system to let readers know which articles are well-written BEFORE they start reading...

Seriously, though, I don't mind the young writers. Everyone's got to start somewhere. Everyone's got to cut their teeth on something. It just seems like almost all of the articles now are by newbies, seems like TBJ's now got almost all new writers, without many experienced ones holding the fort. And that's fine--just how it goes with any business. New folks come; things change. I was honestly just posting a comment to express my point of view on the "whole LinkedIn link" in the article. And I am sorry it hit such a nerve, standards. You're not writing for TBJ, are you?

Doubt wisely; in strange way / To stand inquiring right is not to stray; / To sleep, or run wrong, is. (Donne, Satire III)

britomart wrote:

The new writers are... meh. Not to be age-ist or anything, but most articles sound like the authors are just way young or perhaps just too inexperienced. Like they're all just SO excited about working in BEIJING and REPORTING FOR THE CITY'S PREMIER EXPAT MAGAZINE. I've noticed a lot of newer writers, and I've also noticed that TBJ's articles have gotten increasingly sloppy over the past year or so, and well, kind of boring. So now writers have to resort to "reviewing" mildly pornographic novels to keep readers reading? And it's not just TBJ article content... There are more grammar, punctuation, spelling errors than I remember seeing before--not tons, but it's just not as "clean" as it used to be. I guess it feels a bit like TBJ is hurting from the rapidly shrinking pool of expat talent here in the Great Smoggy Metropolis.

You realize you can stop reading at any time, right? I don't understand why you would assault yourself with having to read content from young enthusiastic writers who aren't as refined or experienced as the good old days that you long for. Seems idiotic to me. Especially when everyone you mention still writes somewhere in the city ...

"Dis is China, you know? You don't like, you go home!"

admin wrote:
Monkey King wrote:
But precious tidbits like someone's Linkedin profile was exactly the kind of precious tidbit this loathesome fellow spent night and day desperately trying to ferret out.

or, um, did a 30-second google search

Yes, well, I didn't say our old friend was any good at it.

WARNING: China Foreign Teachers' Union (CFTU) is a scam run by a convicted felon. UPDATE: He's now calling it China Teacher's Alliance. Still a scam.

I'm not making zippy comebacks today.

Besides, who could take anything away from express70 posts (apart from admin)? That poster is killing it.

Al-Qaeda not being able to use Google?? My colleagues and I are gathered round the screen crying with laughter here.

^ look for count zero to correct your spelling of Al Qaeda in another of his zippy comebacks

 

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Count_zero wrote:

No Steven, you've refused to say why you saw fit to give readers a link to her LinkedIn profile.

And now we know for sure that you're too embarrassed to give your real reason.

Another newsflash: David Cameron lives at 10 Downing Street!

OMG I have compromised British national security!! Al-Quada just cannot use Google!!!

admin wrote:
Monkey King wrote:
But precious tidbits like someone's Linkedin profile was exactly the kind of precious tidbit this loathesome fellow spent night and day desperately trying to ferret out.

or, um, did a 30-second google search

Didn't even take 30 seconds. I found her using her name only on Linkedin in under 10 seconds.

Ssssshhhhhhhhhhh, DON'T TELL ANYBODY!

No Steven, you've refused to say why you saw fit to give readers a link to her LinkedIn profile.

And now we know for sure that you're too embarrassed to give your real reason.

Steven is refusing to say why he did it? Count Zero, the lazy one is you. I've already explained it twice in the above comments, and this will be my final comment on this thread.

OF all the people, why a Chinaman?

Well, she sounds like a real catch! Thankfully she has gotten over the bitterness of seeing men with woman who are too pretty for them to be with-I am sure that is a burden she could not easily avail. But oh, the hardship she has endured by "scrapping the bottom of the barrel" of western men in beijing, now that's a tough one. I mean geez, with blonde hair and two legs, she must be absolutely perplexed as to why men aren't fighting to get into the barrel with her.

Nikki Aaron, dating martyr. If only it wasn't so easy for me to get any beautiful Chinese girl I desire, I suppose I would have to be scrapping the bottom of the barrel and finding her. Thank God for some mercy.

I thought she worked for Metrozine, not City Weekend

 

Books by current and former Beijinger staffers

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Why does she think she has to judge the men here anyway ""most average Western men"" ""below-average men""

""...during the three years we were together.Thanks to that relationship, I can speak colloquial Mandarin (including the kind of swear words""

Well thats what people usualy learn here in their first year, took her 3 years....

"It was an accumulation of things I found increasingly hard to ignore, such as his criticism of Western women (who he would condemn for being overweight, aggressive and too easy) and my deteriorating patience with his personal habits (the stomach-churning sound he made as he spat in the bathroom sink – a daily habit of most locals – or his insistence on wearing the same unwashed clothes for several days in a row)."

She was unhappy with his habits, but she took it for 3 years???

She is just a bitter unhappy person.

Yeah, though honestly for me the LinkedIn link wasn't all that big a deal--odd but that was about it... It's more that I kind of missed the good writing from some of the old reporters. A clean writing style with good research to back it up. Would love to see Lauren McCarthy back. She could write! Any chance of getting Kaiser Kuo back once in a while? George Ding was a fair enough stand-in. Where's he been lately?

The new writers are... meh. Not to be age-ist or anything, but most articles sound like the authors are just way young or perhaps just too inexperienced. Like they're all just SO excited about working in BEIJING and REPORTING FOR THE CITY'S PREMIER EXPAT MAGAZINE. I've noticed a lot of newer writers, and I've also noticed that TBJ's articles have gotten increasingly sloppy over the past year or so, and well, kind of boring. So now writers have to resort to "reviewing" mildly pornographic novels to keep readers reading? And it's not just TBJ article content... There are more grammar, punctuation, spelling errors than I remember seeing before--not tons, but it's just not as "clean" as it used to be. I guess it feels a bit like TBJ is hurting from the rapidly shrinking pool of expat talent here in the Great Smoggy Metropolis.

Doubt wisely; in strange way / To stand inquiring right is not to stray; / To sleep, or run wrong, is. (Donne, Satire III)

Why do articles like this keep on getting coverage? It's the same tired, stereotypical material that keeps getting recycled.

Nikki Aaaron seems like your common or garden Nathan Barley / Max Gogarty (though granted, without the nepotism) meeja type. Completely harmless but tediously unoriginal and dull.

Could this be the real crux of her dating woes?

Yeah, it's strange isn't it, britomart? Definitely smacks of either laziness or creepiness.

Anyway, Steven is refusing to say why he did it so we'll just have to be content with our assumptions.

http://www.lmgtfy.com/?q=%22Steven+Schwankert%22

There's my LinkedIn profile, K?

I linked to a voluntarily-published public profile on a social media site that has 200 million members. That link is the second result that appears to anyone who googles "Nikki Aaron." The search took 4.3 seconds.

Ms Aaron is in no way making any attempt to conceal her identity, her residency in Beijing, her employment, or even her relationship status. While I appreciate that some of you feel that a link in an article on the Beijinger website is so widely read that it might have an impact of any kind, my guess is that if anyone who was not previously aware of Ms. Aaron's existence has suddenly discovered her, then it was on the website of the daily newspaper with a circulation of 1.5 million for whom she voluntarily wrote an article documenting her own amorous adventures, and not a pick up on the Beijinger. I stand by my decision to link to the LinkedIn page and by our reporting.

Before I'd even read these comments about the stalker worries, I saw the article's link to the LinkedIn profile and was honestly confused about what the point was of linking to a personally created job profile... Seemed odd. A personal blog, maybe; another news article about/by her, sure; perhaps a link to Xinhua or City Weekend... but a LinkedIn page? To what... give readers a chance to contact her? Connect with her on LinkedIn? Why? It just struck me as odd in an article that was trying to be all professional; a writer doesn't usually reveal that the source of one's research into someone's background was actually only the page created by the person herself... Sounds as if the author of the article didn't actually bother to go any further to confirm that the info was true. "Look, guys--it's on LinkedIn, so it's obviously true."

Anyway, thought her article was good. Hit a few not-so-pleasant chords. Brought up a few happy and unhappy memories. An extended stay in this country does indeed turn you into a very different person, an "alien" in every culture, a misfit both here and back "home", wherever that may be. The question really is whether that bothers you or not, or whether the not-quite-fitting-in just becomes part of who you are, and you learn to embrace it.

Doubt wisely; in strange way / To stand inquiring right is not to stray; / To sleep, or run wrong, is. (Donne, Satire III)

Monkey King wrote:
But precious tidbits  like someone's Linkedin profile was exactly the kind of precious tidbit this loathesome fellow spent night and day desperately trying to ferret out.

or, um, did a 30-second google search

Books by current and former Beijinger staffers

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Steven Schwankert wrote:

Count_zero, you're suggesting that we shouldn't link to a voluntarily-published public profile of a television presenter who just wrote an article for The Daily Mail, a newspaper with a daily national circulation of 1.5 million people, on a social media site with 200 million members?

I believe that Ms. Aaron would easily meet the definition of "public figure" under just about any reasonable legal code in the world, and as such, the few thousand people who will read this post pose little threat. There is more personal information contained above about me than there is about her, and I am comfortable including it not only on this post but on every one that I write.

I'm not sure I agree. As your employer can attest, this site was once plagued by a bonafide and potentially dangerous stalker, who I believe might very well have carried out his various rape and violence threats. Fortunately he was deported before he had the opportunity to do so, and he's most likely dead or in prison somewhere now. But if by chance he's not, it's all but certain he's still out there masturblurking on TBJ.

Of course it's very unlikely that Ms. Aaron is going to have any problem because someone posted a link to her contact information. But precious tidbits like someone's Linkedin profile was exactly the kind of precious tidbit this loathesome fellow spent night and day desperately trying to ferret out.

WARNING: China Foreign Teachers' Union (CFTU) is a scam run by a convicted felon. UPDATE: He's now calling it China Teacher's Alliance. Still a scam.

> Count_zero, you're suggesting that we shouldn't link to...

You've grasped the basis of what I was saying, yes.

Other than to help stalkers, what was the point of linking to her professional profile? You can give out your own address, home telephone number and the size of frilly knickers you wear, for all you like.

Let's be realistic, you're not likely to attract much in the way of sex pests.

Count_zero, you're suggesting that we shouldn't link to a voluntarily-published public profile of a television presenter who just wrote an article for The Daily Mail, a newspaper with a daily national circulation of 1.5 million people, on a social media site with 200 million members?

I believe that Ms. Aaron would easily meet the definition of "public figure" under just about any reasonable legal code in the world, and as such, the few thousand people who will read this post pose little threat. There is more personal information contained above about me than there is about her, and I am comfortable including it not only on this post but on every one that I write.

Seriously man, you should take down that stalker-enabled social media link. That's well creepy.

Nothing whatsoever to do with "dating doldrums"

> Nikki Aaron, whose LinkedIn profile

Stalker...

I like this bog, but I'm not trying to date any of the local women, just looking for NSA fun. But, unfortunately, so many of them are so traditional, which makes it hard.