Fast Food Watch: This Fruit Sandwich Went Horribly Wrong

Earl, it's a good thing you can't see what Beijing's Wanda Plaza convenience store has done to your sandwich.

About a week ago, the 7-11 lookalike shop from which I regrettably source work-day nutrition decided to combine the fruit and sandwich section and came up with this:

Now, I've heard of pear paninis – stick thin slices between slabs of ham and brie or mozzarella cheese and you've got yourself a quick meal. Then there are grilled banana sandwiches (thank you Elvis), apple sandwiches, and even strawberry toasted cheese. In this case, however, for RMB 14.50, you get a tray of six, square sandwiches filled with kiwi, cantaloupe, and, shockingly, canned peach.

Wait, really? Canned peach?

To give credit where credit is due, canned peach is not much different than a slathering of peach jam on a peanut butter sandwich. So I wasn't that surprised to discover that the peach was actually the most edible of the options. The kiwi and cantaloupe lacked flavor and should've been allowed to ripen before being succumbed to this embarrassing fate.

Thank the sandwich gods that some miserable chef decided it was a better idea to use whipped cream instead of the Kewpie mayonnaise that commonly accompanies fruit salads in Chinese restaurants. Still, the serving of the saccharine condiment was nowhere near enough to warrant paying RMB 2.4 per sandwich. In fact, the fruit itself doesn't even span the entire length of the crustless bread.

Where's an Uncrustable when you need one?

Anyone have a recipe for a fruit sandwich that tops this? What's the craziest food you've found in the convenience store? Leave your comments below.

Photo: sodahead.com